


Don’t Speak (I Know What You’re Saying)

by multishipper_struggles



Category: Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Autumn and Leif are besties, Childhood Friends, Don’t Speak still happens but different, F/F, F/M, Flashbacks, Friends to Enemies to Friends to Lovers, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Jealousy, Kinda, Leif is a Disaster Bisexual, Losing a friend, M/M, Panic Attacks, Tags Are Hard, They’re In Love So, Tobin Batra Has ADHD, Tobin is just a Disaster, Unrequited Love, heart songs, homophobic parents, if that makes any sense, i’ll add tags throughout, ot3 and java if you squint, so are Tobin and Abigail
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-18
Updated: 2021-03-23
Packaged: 2021-03-26 18:07:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30109938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/multishipper_struggles/pseuds/multishipper_struggles
Summary: What if Tobin and Leif had a falling out? So Tobin never joined SPRQ-Point? What would happen if they connected, years later?ORAn AU where Leif and Tobin aren’t best friends anymore
Relationships: Abigail & Tobin Batra, Autumn & Leif Donnelly, Joan/Ava Price, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Tobin Batra & Leif Donnelly, Tobin Batra/Leif Donnelly, Zoey Clarke & Leif Donnelly, Zoey Clarke/Simon Haynes/Max Richman
Comments: 7
Kudos: 10





	1. ‘First’ Impressions

**Author's Note:**

> heyyyyy  
> i finally gave in and wrote an actual fic with plot and shit.  
> sorry if this sucks tho dkdhjd

Leif Donnelly hasn’t talked to his best friend since senior year. 

Well, in all honesty, he can’t really say ‘best friend’ if they haven’t had any contact since high school. But still, Leif thought of his (ex) best friend all the time. Although he doesn’t know why. 

Autumn says that it’s harder for him to move on, even if it was forever ago, because of their connection. 

But those were thoughts for another day. Now, Leif slipped on his cardigan before heading out the door. As he boarded his bike and shook thoughts of high school from his head, Leif took off to go to work. 

Being a coder at SPRQ-Point was a dream come true. Leif remembered when he got the call and nearly screamed in excitement. Laughing slightly as he rode down the street, Leif followed a route that he’d gone on for what felt like forever. 

Finally pulling up to his spot, he got off the bike and strolled in with his bike helmet in hand.

‘If you want to run the place, you gotta act like you already do,’ Leif remember telling Autumn one night while drunk and honestly it’s not that bad of an idea. So he walked with purpose and nodded to his coworkers as he did. 

“Hello Zoey!” 

The ginger looked up at him with a smile on her face, “Hey Leif. You look particularly happy today.”

”Just feels like it’s going to be a good day- no... a good week!” Leif said enthusiastically.

”Good for you! I guess...” she laughed nervously before turning back to her computer. 

As Leif looked towards his own computer and quickly started to work on a new piece of code for the SPRQ-Point watch, Joan appeared in her office door. 

“Hey! Leif, Zoey! My office!” She walked directly back in after saying it and both coders stood slowly.

”Is it me... or does she seem to be in a bit of a better mood,” Zoey whispered. 

She’s not exactly wrong. Usually, Joan just points to you and then her office before sitting back down. So Leif just shrugged and entered the small room.

“Should we sit or-?” Leif started before getting cut off. 

“No this should be quick.” Joan rearrange some papers on her desk and then continued, “We have someone now working here tomorrow. I want you two to show him around.” 

“Who got fired?” Leif immediately asked. 

“We had to let Andrew go. Found some shhhh- stuff in his desk.” Forcing himself not to laugh as Joan whispered, ‘ _professional,_ ’ under her breath, Leif turned to Zoey as she asked a question of her own.

“With all do respect... why can’t you show him around?” she asked tentatively. 

Luckily, Joan’s still in that good mood. “Well- I um- I have an..... event!”

Stuttering. Awkward coughs. ‘Event’. It all pointed to one thing. _A date_.

Joan wasn’t keen on sharing her love life but everyone knew how fond she was of her girlfriend, Ava, from the sixth floor. It was one of the reason Leif felt so safe there. He could express his bisexuality without being criticized or shamed.

But neither of them brought it up and Leif left the office after smiling and saying a quick ‘thank you, goodbye,’.

Leif was already out of hearing range when Zoey turned before leaving the office and simply said, “I almost forgot! What’s his name?”

Joan answered without even looking up from her paperwork. “Tobin. Tobin Batra.”

——————————

Leaving the coffee shop, Tobin took a deep breath and smiled widely. A chance for a job at SPRQ-Point! 

Ever since he learned how good he was at coding and even more so at hacking, Tobin had wanted to be a programmer. 

Before he could get too lost in his thoughts, his phone rang.

”Tobin Batra! What do I owe you the pleasure?” he answered as he usually did.

”Hello. This is Joan from SPRQ-Point. We spoke earlier?”

Choking on his pastry, Tobin nodded before realizing that she couldn’t seem him and cleared his throat quickly, “Uh yes! Yes hi again.”

”Well I am calling to say that I looked over your resume and you’re perfect for the job! You start in two days. All other information will be emailed to you.”

Her voice was clear and strict so Tobin tried his best to sound more professional, “Sounds good to me! See you then, Joan!”

After she hung up, Tobin immediately pulled out Abigail’s contact.

**Toby the Homie**

_!!!!!!_

**Abby Cadabby**

_tobes wtf are you saying_

**Toby the Homie**

_i got the job!!!_

_say hello to tobin, sprq-point employee_

**Abby Cadabby**

_holy shit tobes!!!_

_you did it! you’re officially successful!_

**Toby the Homie**

_damn right i am_

Chuckling as he put away the phone and started to run home. He didn’t live to far and apparently, exercising is good for you. 

“6:30?!” He started at the screen. “Better get some good sleep then.

The day felt boring after getting the news. But fortunately, the next was going to be full of excitement. 

Entering SPRQ-Point felt like a dream. A super crazy dream. As Tobin looked around he felt the anxiety building up in his chest. 

_What if I’m not good enough? What if I get fired? What if-_

”Hey!” Looking up Tobin saw a pretty red head in front of him. “I’m Zoey! You’re Tobin, right?” She extended her hand for him to shake

“Uh yeah!” He smiled and shook the red head’s - Zoey’s - hand, “That’s me.”

”Well, I will be showing you around! One of my coworkers is supposed to be here but I honestly have no clue where he could be!” She frowned as she said the words but caught herself and quickly smiled. “Let’s go!”

You really can’t deny it.... the fourth flour of the building is really fucking cool. It has a cereal bar which can apparently change throughout time. And isolation pods, where you can sit to be alone if you need to. And even plenty of fidgets and toys that could be of service to Tobin.

”So! Where would my desk be?” Tobin finally asked.

”Oh!” Zoey led him to a desk that he assumed is his. “This is yours.” Called it. “That one is mine. That’s Max’s.” A guy sitting behind the desk smiled and waved. “And this one is-“

Suddenly, someone came running through the door with a bike helmet half off their head. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m sorry! I am so sorry that I’m late! I- I don’t know what happened because one minute I’m planning what to say to the new guy and the next... I’m waking up and already late for work! So I probably missed the tour and he’s already here and this is his first impression of me! Great! Great fucking job Leif! You’re so professiona-“

He suddenly froze as he looked at Tobin, eyes wide and mouth hanging slightly open. Leif coughed and blinked as if he was trying to make sure this wasn’t a dream.

” _Oh god_.”


	2. The Memories are Coming Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leif and Tobin remember the last time they actually talked to each other and also tried to avoid the other at all costs (and fail)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what’s up! i’m back!

_“I like the black but I feel like the blue one really complements my eyes! Then again the black looks more professional-“_

_”Leif it’s just prom, not a job interview. Just pick one,” Tobin sighed as he watched his best friend look between the two suits._

_“It is not ‘just prom’, Tobes!” Leif flopped down onto his bed. “This is important to me! I really want to impress her.”_

_Feeling his jaw clench, Tobin couldn’t_ _help but feel jealous. Her._

_“She’s just a girl,” he mumbled. He knew it was petty but Leif was overreacting._

_”Not just a girl! It’s Isabelle Robinson! She pretty and smart and funny and listens to me when I talk about astrology and-“_

_”I listen to you.” Tobin felt taken aback by the statement. He always listens to Leif._

_”It’s not like your interested though!” Leif continued as he saw Tobin’s offended expression. “Come on, I know you don’t like that stuff. Isabelle does!”_

_Pushing back tears, Tobin stood up, “Wear the blue one. It does look nice with your eyes.” He smiled softly as he tried to forget about her._

_Leif nodded and put the black away. “I really really like her, Tobes.” So much for forgetting. “Isabelle gets the things that I know you don’t. And she-“_

_At that point, Tobin blocked Leif out. He didn’t want to listen to that. Didn’t want to know all about Isabelle Robinson._

_After not even listening to what Leif was saying, Tobin snapped. “Ok! I get it! She’s better than me!” Tears we’re running down his face as he yelled._

_”Hey.... hey Tobes, that’s not what I’m saying. You’re my best friend.” Leif was only trying to help but Tobing couldn’t take it anymore._

_”Only your best friend!” He couldn’t help but pace back and forth across the room as he talked. “Nothing else!”_

_Leif looked confused but also.... worried? “Tobin! What are you talking about? Why does this matter to you so much?”_

_”Because I’m in love with you!” After he finally said it, Tobin couldn’t stop everything else. “I want to be the one slow dancing at prom with you and holding your hand and listening to you ramble about the stupidest things at three am! I want to be that person but I know that you don’t want that! You want her!”_

_Eyes wide and watery, Leif reached out to Tobin slowly, “Hey I-“_

_But instead of listening, he left._

_Leif hates you. You’re awful. You don’t deserve him._

_“No, no, no, no,” he whispered as he collapsed against a random alleyway wall._

_When prom finally came around, Tobin avoided Leif and Isabelle as much as he could. At one point, Isabelle asked him if he wanted to hang out with them. Sending her away, all Tobin could think is that she is a good person. She does deserve to have Tobin wish she didn’t exist. But he still wished to be her._

—————————-

“Do you two know each other?” Zoey asked in confusion.

”Uh yeah..... yeah we went to high school together,” Tobin managed.

”Huh,” Zoey shrugged, “Small world, right?”

Just nodding, Tobin sat down at his desk. Already planning his strategy to avoid Leif.

Tapping away at his computer, Leif tried to ignore the fact that Tobin was actually here. It was confusing and distracting. Right now, code. Nothing else. 

Hearing the elevator doors open, all the programmers - except Tobin - said a chorus of “Hi Ava. Hi Joan”’s without even looking up from their computers

“Hello hello!” Joan smiled as she walked towards her office. “Just forgot something.”

”You’re new.”

Tobin looked up to see Ava standing above him. “Yeah. I’m replacing... Andrew.”

”Ah,” Ava took a beat before continuing, “He was kinda insane. Not the good kind. Be better...”

”Oh! Tobin,” he said with a small wave. 

“I’m Ava and- oh! Joanie, this new one seems very charming.” 

Joan smiled. “Hello Tobin. Nice to see you again.” He nodded at her. 

They both said goodbye to everyone and walked out hand-in-hand. “Are they dating?” Tobin suddenly said.

”They are! Do you have a problem with that,” Zoey sounded like she was threatening him and in all honesty it’s terrifying.

”Nope. Just wondering. Plus I have _awesome_ gaydar.” He tapped his head as he said the last two words. 

Leif attempted not to laugh at the memory of Tobin pointing to random kids in school and trying to guess their sexuality. Never got a single one right.

—————————

The day was going great! No heart songs. No issues between Tobin and the other coders. But emphasis on the word ‘ _was_ ’.

Of course as Zoey worked, music started to play but when she turned to see who was singing, it shocked her. Tobin had turned and opened his mouth.

_’You and me. We used to be together, always.’_

As he sang, Tobin slowly walked towards Leif. 

_‘I really feel that I’m losin’ my best friend. I can’t believe that was the end.’_

Here comes the dance number.

_’Don’t speak, I know just what your sayin’! So please stop explainin’! Don’t tell me cause it hurts! Don’t speak, I know what you’re thinkin’! I don’t need your reasons! Don’t tell me cause it hurts.’_

Dancing around Leif as he sang, Tobin looked more heartbroken than angry.

_‘Our memories, well, they can be inviting but some are altogether mighty frightening.’_

As he sang the last word, Tobin drew a heart in fogged up glass. Was there something between them?

_’As we die, both you and I! With my head in my hands I sit and cry.’_

He slammed his fist on the ground in time with the beat. Getting angrier and angrier.

_‘Don’t speak, I know what you’re sayin’! So please stop explainin’! Don’t tell me cause it hurts!’_

The music ended and Tobin was back in his seat, doing his work quietly. 

“Hey Tobin! Can I see you over- somewhere else?” Zoey tried not to sound to suspicious and gestured for him to follow after seeing him nodding hesitantly.

”What’s up Red?” Tobin asked, taking Zoey by surprise.

”A nickname?” He shrugged so she continued. “Ok well I need to talk to you about Leif.”

Tobin frowned and wrinkled his nose, “Why him specifically?”

”Well... you went to school together and I want make sure there’s no bad blood between you guys!”

”O-kay. Well no, I don’t think so. We were friend and lost touch in senior year but nothing worth noting.” Zoey could tell he was lying through his teeth.

”Well if there is anything that you _don’t wanna speak_ about. You can tell me.” With that she left, leaving Tobin looking and feeling extremely confused.

”Don’t worry. She does that all the time.” Tobin turned to see another guy in front of him. “I’m Simon. Zoey can practically read your mind though.”

Just nodding and waving goodbye to Simon, he sat backdown in front of the computer.

————————-

It was already Tobin’s third day on the job and Leif had successfully avoided him.

That was until now. 

Joan and Zoey were suddenly next to him, smiling strangely. 

“Yes..?” Leif said after a minute.

”You’re working on a new project!” Joan said as she handed him a pile of papers.

”Oh! That’s great!” He had been scared for a minute there. But what could he have been afraid of?

”With Tobin!” Zoey added.

_Oh. That._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one might be a bit shorter but just vibe ig


	3. It Really Is Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Autum comes to the fourth floor and meets Tobin.   
> Meanwhile, Leif and Tobin are working together again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am back with another chapter! enjoy!
> 
> TW: panic attacks

Turning in his chair, Max’s eyes fell on a familiar face. Autumn was looking at her phone but Max recognized her immediately. 

“Hey Zo,” he called out, “What’s Autumn doing here?”

”Oh!” Zoey gasped and looked over. “No clue. I didn’t even realize she was here until you pointed it out.”

”Yeah, well, I would like to know why my ex girlfriend is in our office.” 

Max went to go and talk to her but stopped when he heard Leif address her first.

”I’m almost done Autz. Just let me finish this up and maybe I’ll show you around.”

Sitting back down, Max looked over to his girlfriend again. “They know each other?”

Zoey laughed quietly, “I don’t know! I guess they do. Lets not ponder on it.”

But when she saw Leif and Autumn sit down at the waffle bar - as it was at the moment - Zoey walked over and started to ‘make a waffle’.

”-really is him,” she heard Autumn say, just above a whisper. “He’s kinda hot.”

”Autumn!” Leif protested. Zoey could practically see his wide eyes and his lips pressed together in a thin line. 

“What? I’m a speaker of truth. And my truth says that Tobin - from your very tragic ex best friend story - is hot!” 

“I hate you so much,” Leif sighed and Zoey heard his head hit the table. “But I guess you’re kinda right.” He paused for a minute before saying, “Not that I’m still hung up on him or anything.” A - very fake - cough followed his words as he finished quickly.

Having at least a little information was good enough, so Zoey snuck back to her desk quietly and watched Autumn and Leif leave the office.

———————————-

Tobin was listening to Leif’s instructions and pointers to finish the project they were working on. The two had been assigned to fix a major glitch on the SPRQ-Point watch that could ruin the entire project. Of course they had to be the ‘co-leads’. Joan couldn’t have picked anyone else?

”Look all you have to do, is trust me on this. I know what I’m doing,” Leif told him as he walked back to the desk behind him.

”Maybe I would trust you if you hadn’t dropped me the second you had an out,” Tobin found himself saying before he could stop.

Everyone turned to them. Zoey, Max, and Simon, who were talking at a desk. Glen and Marcus from across the room. But luckily not Joan, who was still in her office working.

“Well I wasn’t the one who avoided you like the plague,” Leif quickly shot back. It was almost funny how practiced it sounded.

But Tobin just scowled and went back to working. One hand tapping the keys and the other playing with a stress ball. Fidgets like that had always helped Tobin focus, so he loaded his desk with them.

As he worked, Tobin heard someone approach him. 

“Hey.” He recognized the voice and turned to see Simon. “Are you good man? Leif can be a bit crude but he only means the best.”

”Sure. I don’t care about Leif. I’m just going to get the project done.” 

Simon didn’t believe a word of it but Leif did. And it hit him like a wrecking ball.

_I don’t care about Leif._

After everything that had happened, he still had hope that Tobin still cared about him. Shifting uncomfortably, Leif tried to focus on the code that covered his screen. But the anxiety in his chest kept building up. So he rushed to the bathroom as quick as possible, ignoring the whispers from his coworkers.

The door slammed closed and Leif shakily grabbed his phone and dialed the familiar number.

”Pick up Autumn....” 

He waited for an answer, his breath quick and staggered. When he heard Autumn’s voice on the other line, it felt like he was woken from the dead.

”Leif? Are you ok?” her worrying voice came through the speaker.

”N- not really,” he stammered out. “It’s pr- probably the stupidest panic attack I’ve had in a w- while.”

”If it’s a panic attack it isn’t stupid, Leif. We’ve talked about this!” Autumn’s stern ‘mother’s voice’ - as Leif liked to call it - shown through. “Try to steady your breathing and do the naming exercise I taught you.”

After helping Leif through a panic attack, Autumn picked up some things to help him with them.

Five things you see. 

“Sink. Toilet. Door. Pipes. Shoes.”

Four things you feel

”Phone. Cardigan. Floor. Hands.”

Three things you hear.

”Autumn. My voice. Typing.”

Two things you smell.

”Toilet water. Waffles.”

One thing you taste.

”Strawberries. From earlier.”

He could practically hear Autumn smiling through the phone. “Do you feel any better?” 

“Yeah. Yeah I think I’m ok.”

”Now, tell me what that was about,” her calm voice was soothing and Leif knows he can trust her. 

“Tobin said he doesn’t care about me. I know it’s stupid and I should’ve known that’s how he feels but it still-“

”Hurts?” Autumn finished hesitantly. “When I dated Max, I already knew how he felt for Zoey. But it still hurt when he ended things. It’s going to hurt Leif.”

”I know. I know,” he whispered, “Thanks Autz. I love you.”

”Love you too, dork,” she giggled, “We’ll hang out again when your finished.”

Leif just agreed and then straightened out his clothes along with fixing his hair and erasing any trace that he had cried.

At least no one was looking at him or asking ‘are you ok?’ in that fake sympathetic voice as he walked out and returned to his desk without a word. No one needs to know about his problems. 

Leif caught Tobin’s eye but the other looked away as quick as possible.

_So he was looking at me?_ Leif thought to himself, _Why?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the method that leif uses is one that i use myself so-  
> hope you like it!


End file.
